[Opting out of preschool, continued]

This preschool thing can be totally overwhelming and there is a lot of pressure to send your kids off to school ASAP. Just remember that many parents need their children to go to school since they both work. Anyhow, my daughter, who is 3.3 years, just began preschool in an extremely sweet atmosphere and small group...only six kids per class. I truly feel that she was and is ready for this experience. I am a stay at home mom (now pregnant with twins) and I took a number of classes with her over the past two years. They can be tiresome even though I LOVED watching her development. I think that school, so far, is extremely beneficial for her. She is gaining independence from me but most importantly she WANTS to be there with the other kids. It's a mixed age group and she is learning how to socialize and behave. The program is only three days and that's all I feel that she needs for now. Anyhow, I don't really have any true advice for you but I must admit that selfishly I'm enjoying having a couple hours to myself as well. Our experience has been a positive one. But you have to be comfortable with your decision.

Mine will be three years and three months next September and we're going through this debate now. I went to nursery school at age four and so many parents I've talked to didn't go to school until kindergarten. Lots of people in our parents' generation didn't go to school until first grade...and they are extremely socialized :-) I think it's whatever works best for your schedule and budget.

We waited until nursery to send our older son to school. I think he was well stimulated by play dates, individual classes and spending time with his nanny doing fun things like zoo trips, museums, etc. I never really thought about whether we would have done it differently, but now that you ask... I think there are pros and cons and that there probably isn't one right answer. I don't regret having kept him home until nursery, but I do wonder whether he might have integrated better into the classroom initially if we'd sent him to school earlier.

As for our twins, that's a very different story. They were at home receiving tons of therapy each day through early intervention and weren't approved for center-based until they hit pre-school age. We probably could have gotten them in to center-based but no one was recommending it to us and we didn't really know enough about it at the time to know whether it would have been a better option. While they were at home, we also scheduled classes for them when they weren't scheduled for therapy.

IF there is a school you are REALLY interested in, the 2's program is a lot easier to get into. Otherwise, I think it is a waste of a TON of money (especially when you have to double it). My children started school in the 3's program and it has been a wonderful experience.

I have b/g twins who are two years and nine months now.  We did not send them to a 2s program but we are applying now to send them to a 3s program next September. I agree with you re feeling like we're in the minority. It just seems like people send their kids to school so early in the city! Anyway, the main activity for my twins is play dates with other kids and a drop off program at my gym. (I work out at Reebok on Columbus and 67th. It has a day care there so I leave the twins there while I work out 3 times per week. I started leaving them there when they were 9 months and they've been going consistently since.  Each time, I leave them for 2 hours so I felt that the experience was somewhat similar to that of a 2s program.  Its not structured and is more of a day care environment but I felt ok with that since at this age they just need some socialization and it's just for 2 hours at a time.)

As you know, preschool is not legally required. But I'd like my kids to go to a 3s program next year. I think it'll make a difference since most kindergarten programs are full days and I think it might be a lot to jump from no school to a full day program every day of the week. I guess what I'm saying is that I think they'd need to build up some 'stamina.'

Right now, they are just signed up for one music class at Rutgers. Prior to that, we just did one semester of art there. I think taking a class is helpful in that it teaches the kids to clean up and listen to what the teacher says. I don't personally feel that a lot of classes are necessary. I'd never want to over-schedule my children at age two! Besides, I feel that there are so many fun/enriching things to do around the city that I don't feel classes are always worthwhile. We go to a museum almost every week.

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